Vanity Card #47 – The Falling Into A Foxhole

The Falling Into A Foxhole

Most of us run our entire lives searching for something that truly defines happiness. For most of my own adolescent life I have always thought that true happiness was a some kind of enigmatic mixture of love and wealth.

In recent times I have started to rethink every single assumption I have concocted during my growing spurt years. Re-imagining the definition of happiness is a ludicrous attempt for a mind that has grown roots into the very culture it has been blessed or cursed with. I do believe that we all are free souls to some extent, but it does not change the fact that most of us are frankly the products of our environment.

Wealth always carries a taxman on its heels, which grandly pursues and consumes us in order to make us consume more. The mirage of truly owning something on this god forsaken rock planet, orbiting in the space where we humans are merely the size of ants – is a god blessed, entitled sense of false security.We are only a one specie among thousands of others after all, a dominant one surely,  the one that evolved from the warmth of the thousand rays of a star that was cast aside us 13.8 billion years ago.

So what about the greatest sensation of an eternal connection with the whole universe as we know it – Love – has to do with everything?

If the history of the mankind has taught us anything – we humans have always defined our purpose by the historical era we have been living in. In the stone ages, we were destined to hunt mammoths, provide for our tribe and extend our reach as much as possible. In many cases we were feasting one on one with the nature, shouting and growling while making new tribe members and watching our tail for the vicious sabertooth tiger.

During stone ages love was merely a chemical back draft in the back mirror of being able to reproduce and keep surviving in the cruel world where the man was switching roles about being the hunter and the hunted on a daily basis.

What feels like light years away from the stone ages, the industrial revolution peaked 300 years ago from our current standing point in history. During these troubling times we tried to cultivate our population, while sacrificing the youth and the working class in shady coal mines and factory halls, desperately providing our families with suitable accommodation and a warm meal. The future was here.

Somewhere in the distant timeline we had become so progressively distant from the roots of our ancestors that our mind  had started to create a universe of its own – a whole construction of man made rules in order to keep ourselves hooked on the sense of purpose. We found love in rooting ourselves into a society that works on the blood and sweat of those who believe they can create a world of their own within the planet made by the universe. We found each other in the chains of our own logical thinking, bleeding for a simple sense of being accepted and loved by other survivors.

We found love in a hopeless place.

Yes – I’m quoting Rihanna right now..or like I would like to say – a team of professional pop songwriters. Simplicity creates attraction.

I am not saying that true purpose does not exist for us single soul humans.

I am merely saying that tonight I dissected my own insecurity of not being happy – which is evidently not true – by a simply creating a dialogue and finding the purpose between the words delivered to be hurtful in the most imaginative way possible.

We keep on falling into foxholes only to find a better trench.

Vanity Card #46 – The Pursuit of New Reneissance

The older I grow, the more and the merrier I acknowledge the fact that the media and our western culture pushes our understanding of the good life to the brink of personal bankruptcy.


The older I grow, the more and the merrier I acknowledge the fact that the media and our western culture pushes our understanding of the good life to the brink of personal bankruptcy.

Our generation (I am talking about the last generation that escaped the womb to experience first hand the joy of Tamagotchi’s, Super Mario and the hair-craze flat iron) was the last victim of the values that were hardened on us when we were little, taught when the world was wearing a sundress  – thrilling us to believe that honest hard work, long office hours, family of five kids accompanied by a dog was all the marital bliss one individual was able to achieve during one lifetime.

Twenty-something years later the same generation finds themselves as a graduate from the long drive through of ECTS credits with a damn fine diploma to bury it away somewhere in the middle of five to ten menial job credentials.

The world lies in ruins, the economy is stripped down to the bare essentials and the most conspiracy-nut jobs talk about inside jobs that were paid posthumously by Steve Jobs to corporate the whole world by giving blowjobs to the Wall-Street executives that bribe cops to kill a fellow worker for just the price of a happy meal.

You might smell a hint of exaggeration between my ramblings but nobody can’t avoid the fact that our society builds upon commercializing everything under the sun and the general public’s highway to have a happy, joyful life is to get a loan or find a loan shark to finance your dream of being in debt for the rest of your life.

I am hardly the last of the Mohicans that tries to hunt traces of freedom from the pursuit of preserved continuity, from the vast legends long told before we were ready to put our suits on and walk into the office closet in the name of prosperity. Back to the roots of the curious minds of the Renaissance.

I want to be free, to think different and capture the world as long as my pulsing heart gives me time.

There is no home like that left- most sanctums have been sold for eight pieces of soul and five days of your week. We treat every philosopher, poor stranger, asylum seeker and a free thinker as the inhumane, jobless husk of a soul not worth a dime for the society. Media directs our attention to Kardashians and the rest of the celebrity gossip. Evolution is still discussed as a theory rather than the force that molds the world we live in.

The quote by Eleanor Roosevelt has never been so true as today:

Great minds discuss ideas; average discuss events; small minds discuss people.

The community keeps baiting both sides into a open conflict, hence the riot claims more lives than spent dollars. Yet I truly believe we are on the edge of another breakthrough of our current society model. We have been riding this train of 1800’s factory worker way too long and the stop is long due. I dream of a better world.

World where we create jobs where they truly exist rather than forcing every individual into a pressurized model that does not fit ones hinges. We are not clay, we are blood, bones and guts.

Unity is assembled from the chess set pieces.

So believe me when I state this – no authority in the modern society should point which cog you should be in the clockwork of the mankind.

Keep tickin’ to your own purpose and dreams before you simply seize to exist.