Vanity Card #5 – The Bed Monsters


I have a guilty conscience, sometimes for very stupid reasons.

Good thing I’m not a catholic believer. All those blowjobs and bending over for the holy spirit. Kidding. Pope Benedict once declared pedophilia was normal back in his glory days. Shit. Sorry. I’ve gotten badly sidetracked. Hats off to the new Pope though, he is awesome.

The real issue today is my sleeping. I woke up at 1 PM today. My valiant attorney (side personality) claimed for my defense that I actually went to sleep too late. Still waiting for the jury to vote.

We find the defendant George..not guilty and well rested!

Somehow it still feels wrong, you know? These are the conflicting times my friend, getting revenge on the world by sleeping late, leaving someone else to pick up the suitcase and run to the office at 6 AM! It feels wrong, but so good. Kinda like doing wrong stuff with your ex-girlfriends best friend..or your friends ex-girlfriend. Can’t help it, sleeping in just makes my brain move faster (pun intended). Since I’m trying to break the Da Vinci code here, here’s the real moral lesson of the Twilight Trilogy:

Men are usually monsters and they always crave for younger women.


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